Patience
My name is Patience, and I am queer and spiritual. Growing up, I served as a worship leader in the church for years.
But I felt out of place as I heard sermons about how being queer was a sin. My parents were always supportive of me but being having a fixed presence in the church made things difficult.
In High School, I began to take steps to feel more like myself including cutting off my hair and wearing boys’ clothes. At the time, I thought those steps were what was missing in my life, but then I had my first crush on a girl.
Pronouns: she/they
Photo of Patience
I didn’t know what to do with those feelings. I knew that I was an ally but there was no way I could be queer and be in my church family.
I spent the rest of high school pushing my feelings down and hiding away. I felt stuck in a box. This led me to separate myself from the church after I graduated high school. I felt lost and didn’t know what to do. The church had been a big part of my identity for so long, who was I outside of it?
I found myself meditating, praying, thinking about my connection to the Earth, which I correlate strongly to my connection with God. I realized my negative self-image was created by those interpreting the words of man inspired by God, not from God.
After a lot of soul searching, I find myself at peace. I know there’s a God out there who loves me just the way they made me. I don’t have to hide away to earn that love and peace.
Photo of Patience
